Friday, June 29, 2012

Hailey and Nana Enjoying the Day Together


Is she the cutest!
This is what life is all about.  Enjoying moments that take my breath away! 


Wednesday, June 27, 2012

I HATE DEXADRON!!!!

I hate the steroid Dexadron I take each week.  Talk about quality of life, it SUCKS!!!  I'm sick Tuesday and Wednesday, then Thursday, Friday and Saturday I'm so sore and tired.  The new drug is causing problems too.  I'm really tired and have GI tract problems to deal with.  These drugs are awful.  What is worst the drugs or the disease?

I guess I'm having a pitty party by myself but it hurts.  Things have changed so quickly the past 4 years and its sometimes hard to deal with.  Yes I know there are worse people out there then me but they are not ME!  I'm suffering too.  But then reality sets in and I realize I could have died 3 1/2 years ago.  I wouldn't have seen my beautiful grandchildren who keep me fighting each day along with Mom, Mark, my sons, Erin and my loving family and friends.  So I will continue to fight!!

July 13th will be Jamae and Jazmin's 22nd birthday.  Evelyn and I and the girls will be together.  We planned to have a picnic at the beach in Bodega Bay that day.  I'm so excited.  It will be a day of many treasured moments.  Evelyn wants to spend that day with me.  I'm so blessed to have a donor family who loves me.

Next week Mark and I will be staying at the lake house from Tuesday till Sunday.  We are so excited to have all that time off together up there.  We will be spending time with Todd and Sherrie Schapmire one day and Mark and Erin with the kids will be up on Saturday.  I'm happy Markie is coming up.  We have talked about feeding the ducks, walking Mia to the dog run and playing in the swim area.  It will be so much fun!  Mark and I will take a drive around the lake one day.  I want to go to Gaylan's drug store in Lucerene.  She has a cute gift shop I want to see if she has these colorful fish she gave to Christine.  They are beautiful!  Also, there is a gift shop in Kelseyville that everytime I go there it's closed (weird hours).  So maybe I can go there too and it will be opened.  Cute stuff in the window.

Today is a down day and I will rest at home.  I have a house keeper coming because I can't do it anymore.  I don't have the strenght.  See things have changed and it hurts that I can't do the things I did before.  But my health is more important.

Have a wonderful day and remember to make moments that take your breath away!

GO GIANTS!!!!

Love,
Debbie

Monday, June 18, 2012

Awesome Weekend!

What a great weekend at the lake.  The weather was so hot but I have A/C in my little trailer so I was so comfortable.  Mark went and played at his favorite spot (casino) and I just laid around reading, watching movies, visiting with friends.  I love walking my little puppy around especially in the morning before the sun comes up.  The sun rise is so beautiful.  It is my favorite time of the day.

Yesterday was Father's Day and Mark and I got to watch our grand kids for a few hours.  I'm so amazed how much Little Markie is talking.  He watered plants with Papa and then came to me and said he was tried watering and wanted milk.  He reminds me so much of my son, Mark.  Yesterday Mark took him to the Parents and Puppies ice skating session.  He told me "I did it Nana".  He said the ice was cold and slippery.
Little Markie loves to help.  He helps me weed and helps his Dad wash the car.  Papa is so proud of him.  Here he is washing his little car.

My little girl is growing so fast.  She is crawling, well going backwards, sitting up and rolling over.  Trouble begins now.  Erin said soon we will be able to get her ears pierced.  Nana gets to buy her first diamond earrings.  She loves jewelry.  She grabs my necklaces and bracelets all the time.  I told her Dad he is in big trouble with her.  Six months old.  I'm so blessed to have this time with them. 

No side effects yet from the second dose of Cytoxan.  Just alot of problems with my GI tract.  Dr. Dana said this is the chemo and steroid.  It could be the amyloid in the stomach and colon but she said as time goes on and if the amyloid increases in these areas I will have problems.  I asked her about meeting with a dietitian but she said with the drugs I take it wouldn't help.  Besides I watch what foods effect my GI tract and try to stay away from those.  It's funny reading the labels on my chemo and other drugs say the same thing "can cause nausea and ......."

Funny!!!!  Oh that is what happens in the middle of the night!!

Have a wonderful week and remember every moment is a gift!  I am so rich and full of gifts!!!!!

Love,
Debbie

Friday, June 15, 2012

Going to the Lake

Mark is so funny.  He didn't want to go to the lake this weekend.  He wanted to stay home and do yard work.  YUCK!  I said its going to be over 90 degrees.  Let's do it next weekend.  So we are off to the lake!

I know it will be hot up there but I have A/C in the trailer and I will enjoy relaxing in my little place watching new movies I got.  Friends are coming up so we will be relaxing and enjoying the moments.

Mark and Erin took the kids to Monterey to see the aquarium and today on their way home they are taking them to the Oakland Zoo.  Mark said little Markie loved the fish.  Their hotel room walked right onto the beach and Markie played in the sand and water.  He loves to play in the sand.  When he is here with me at home we play in his sand box for hours.  He yells at me to "dig Nana".  We make mountains and sand castles.  So much fun!  My little girl is starting to sit up, roll over and Daddy said she even is trying to crawl.  Oh boy here comes trouble! 

I start my second round of Cytoxan today for the next 5 days.  Higher dose so we will see how this effects me.  I'm really sore today from the Dex and Velcade this week but that is normal for Friday.  So far my blood counts are doing good and hopefully this will stay that way.  I just have to stay healthy.

Lots of good things are coming my way and it finally feels great.  I'm adjusting to less stress and good people in my life.  Mark and I are enjoying every moment with our family and friends.  Life is good.  I just wish my health was good but I'm still fighting and will never stop.  I have too much to live for.

So I'm off to my little trailer at the lake.  The minute I enter those gates my body goes into relax mode and total peace.  Can't wait to get there!

Enjoy every moment!
Love,
Debbie

Monday, June 11, 2012

Had A Wonderful Weekend!!!

This past weekend was so relaxing!  Mark and I went to the lake on Friday.  The weather was a little cold on Friday night with the wind blowing.  We had dinner and then went to bed early and listened to the wind blowing outside.  The next morning it was beautiful!  The sun was bright on the lake and the wind was gone.  We went to Lakeport to visit with friends and I went to my favorite store - The Dollar Store.  I can't believe I can get 5 gallons of water, car wash, grill cleaner, sponges 3 packages, 3 room fresheners, 2 bottles of Windex, pastry brush, 2 big bottles of bubbles for Markie all for $19.00.  I love that store.  Came back to the trailer and sat outside on the patio watching a chipmunk eat all my bird feed.  What a little piggy?  There was no one at the lake and I like it that way.  I can walk Mia around and not worry that someone will get upset.  Watched the giants win and the Stanley Cup Finals.  Mark and I had dinner and it is so funny.  We both eat and just want to hang out and do nothing.  We watched a movie and then went to bed.  Yesterday was Laura's, my nephew Anthony's fiance's bridal shower.  Lots of fun!  They are so sweet and I can't wait for the wedding in August.

Hailey 6 months old



This week is second round of Cytoxan at a higher dose.  With the disease spreading to other parts of the body I have to do whatever I can to stop this.  I want more moments!  Spending time with my grand children keeps me fighting!

Enjoy every moment!

Love,
Debbie

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

HOPING TO FEEL BETTER SOON!

These past few weeks have been rough.  I did have the flu and the reason why I know is because several friends at the lake came down with it too.  I think I'm over that.  I started chemo again this week and feel the same side effects as usual (nausea and soreness and really tired).  My white cell count is going down and that's why I feel tired.  I start second course of Cytoxan next week and dose will increase to 250mg.  We'll see if I feel any side effects with the increase of the dose.

Yesterday I spent most of the day at the hospital.  I had a 9:00am appointment with nuclear imaging to inject radio active dye into my veins which will go to my bones in order to perform the bone scan at noon.  Then it was off to chemo and back to nuclear imaging.  The bone scan took about an hour but the nurse said the doctor wanted to review the images before I left.  Moments later she said that the images showed abnormal findings in my head and that I had to do skull xrays.  I thought what is this about.  So off I went to xray to do the xray on my head.  I left the hospital and 10 minutes later Kaiser was calling saying the doctor wanted more xrays and to come back ASAP.  At this time, I'm feeling so stressed.  I hadn't eaten and it was 3:00PM and all I wanted to do was go home eat and go to sleep.  I was so tired.  Later that day the foot doctor called to say the broken foot was confirmed on the bone scan and to keep wearing the boot for 4-6 weeks.  Then he said I'm not an expert in the field to discuss the head findings but from what he read it look normal.  Thank God.  So I came home and received an email from Dr. Dana who said that the CMV test was negative.  That's good too but there's still one more test she is waiting for to confirm what exactly is going on.  I asked her to look at the report of the bone scan and she also said the abnormal findings were normal and in her words it made me laugh "basically you have a thick head".  Mark laughed and said he could have told the doctors that without a bone scan.  HAHA!  So now I wait for the other test Dr. Dana ordered and see what the next step would be.  I did receive the results from the biopsies from the colonoscopy.  It confirmed Amyloid in the colon and that is most likely why I'm having so much trouble with the stomach and colon.  Nothing they can do and continue treatment.

This weekend its off to the lake.  So excited.  I need to rest and relax.  This has been a very stressful 2 weeks.

Have a wonderful day and enjoy the moment.
Love,
Debbie